this is a Friends Only journal! all my fanfics and random-fandom posts are still available to the public, but for a more intimate look at my life (and maybe some fanboy-ish rants on JE, YG and other entertainment companies), friend me. be warned, i may f-lock fics in the future.

Title: Little Secrets
Rating: pg
Pairing: Koyashige

They met at a group for people of varying sexual orientations, just at random. It wasn't as if Koyama had gone to the club just to see Katou, that's just the way it ended up. And then they just happened to bump into each other at a cafe, and talked until Katou had to get back to class. They began talking more and more and eventually, Katou developed a crush on the older man.

The fact that he was a man, and Koyama was a man didn't freak Katou out. Not in the least. His sexuality fluctuated daily, and although it was annoying, and frustrating at times, the fact that he found himself overwhelmingly attracted to Koyama didn't bother him. What bothered him was the fact that he just couldn't get up the courage to tell the other how he was feeling. Emotions welled up and Katou felt as though he would explode, but he didn't know what to do. How do you know when someone likes you unless they make it obvious?

He and Koyama got along brilliantly. Their minds were alike, yet different, each with separate pursuits and ideas. It was these similarities that drew them together. Katou assumed that this was the reason that Koyama treated him differently. The way he'd turn his attention completely on him, laugh at all the right moments, ask him thoughtful questions, look at him with those dark brown eyes as if he were the only one in the world. Katou's friends told him it was obvious that the older man was interested, but Katou couldn't be sure, and he was usually a very self-assured guy. Koyama was an affectionate person who loved his friends dearly, so how could Katou be so certain that when Koyama wrapped his thin, muscled arms around him, and held him, and held him, only releasing him to smile warmly and finally say good-bye, how would Katou know if he was interested, or just being loving?

These thoughts trailed Katou long into the night, haunting him with long, miserable visions of life-after-confessions when it went for the worst. The fantasies of a happy relationship with Koyama left him smiling as he slept, and grinning as he woke, but he knew it wouldn't happen. He just knew it. Because things never went that way, right? He wonder how on earth anyone ever got into a relationship, what with all the anxiety that came before it.

These imaginings plagued him as he studied one day with his friend, Mariko.

"Do it!" she urged him, leaning near him. "You're going to have to do it sooner or later, otherwise he'll never know and you'll burst!"

"So let him remain in the dark, and my innards splatter on the walls."

Mariko made a face and laughed. "No, I don't like that plan."

"But I just... can't." He said, almost exasperatedly.

"Why not???"

"I'm just... scared." he buried his nose in his book, blushing faintly.

"Why? What would it change? Honestly."

Katou didn't look up, but he thought about it. Really honestly.

He thought about it on the train.

While brushing his teeth.

As he read.

While he lay in bed.

What would it change? Really? He mulled over his experiences with Koyama. He pondered on the way he behaved, and tried to gauge what his worst reaction would be. The result was rather disappointing because it meant that he might actually have to do this.
At worst, things would be awkward for a few days, and then things would go back to normal.
In the end, Katou was more worried about himself. If Koyama rejected him, he wasn't sure his heart could take it.

The next day, Koyama and Katou had planned to meet at the cafe where they'd met before. It was drizzling and the sky was a dull grey, but it wasn't all that cold. Katou headed toward the shop when a light tap met his shoulder. He turned and saw Koyama grinning kindly at him.
"Hey!"
"Hey." Katou replied, feeling his heart warm and thump happily.

They both ordered hot drinks and chatted in a very friendly manner, both smiling more than you could imagine.
Just as Katou checked his watch and was about to leave, Koyama stopped him and gave him one of those long, wonderful hugs.
When they broke apart, Katou stared at him, biting his lip. Koyama's brow furrowed in worry; he assumed that he must've looked sick or something.
"Are you o-"
"Koyama."
The older man shut his mouth (which was hard to make him do.)
"I have this problem... and... and I really need you to know about it. I don't necessarily need you to help me with it, I just need you to hear me out."
Koyama nodded slowly, still very concerned. "What's your problem?"
I can't believe that I'm using this line. It's so OLD. I should not be using this line!
"I... I really... kinda... k-kinda... like you...?"
It wasn't actually a question, but Koyama knew that.
A smile stretched across his face and he gripped Katou tightly between his arms.
Katou gasped for air and felt utterly bewildered.
"I'm so glad!" Koyama exclaimed.
Then it donned on Katou.
His cheeks began to hurt and he thought that he must look like the world's biggest dork, what with the smile he carried.

Katou knew that he had to leave, but he made Koyama promise that he'd call him later and gave him one last hug.

********************************************************************************

ok, so technically this happened on Tuesday, 2009-4-14, but i haven't really had a lot of time to do a review. today i was just like, 'Ok, man, you've got a minute, just do it.' so here i am :)

first of all, let me say this: THE CONCERT WAS AMAZING.

it was my first ever concert, and i don't think any concert (not even a NEWS or KAT-TUN concert) could've been a better first. i had to get used to the elbows in my jaw, ear, eye, face in general, and the basic lack of manners, but that wasn't hard, i got a little pre-occupied by what was happening on the the stage.

i arrived at Slim's at about 6:30 probably, to wait with my friends who'd been in line since 11 that morning. it was a exquisitely windy day, i believe the winds were about 65 mph? it was cold too :p but anyway, we waited in the cold, checking out the other people in line. although only a few people were good-looking, i did manage to notice that there were more guys there than i'd though there would be. this put me at ease, a bit; Michael and i wouldn't be the only guys who were going to be drooling over the band. finally they let us in and we rushed to the front. the nice thing about Slim's is that it's small, so you can get really close to the stage. we watched and waited with baited breath as the manager and rodey (i'm assuming) tuned the instruments. everyone was antsy and jumping everytime the backstage door opened. i became quite aware that there was another fanboy right next to me, looking thoroughly eager. he was quite a cutie. i later ended up right behind him for part of the night, which was fun :)

then, a little after 8, the techno music subsided and the lights dimmed, screams erupted from the crowd; we knew what was coming next. first Teruki came on, grinning as he went to his post. i'll admit, i thought he was Kanon at first, with his hair all in his face and what-not. i was like, 'where'd all of Kanon's hair go??' then when he went to the drums i was like, face-palm, duuuuuuuuuh. then Yuuki bounced (yes) onto the stage and went to his keyboard. now, i must make it very clear that everyone, myself certainly included, were cheering as each member came on stage, but when the next guy cam on, i really (tried) made some noise. it was Kanon. my idol of the band and looking really good. his hair is really long now, and he's kind of got some baby-dreads going on at the bottom. i normally don't go for dreads, but Asians can sometimes pull them off in certain styles. he REALLY reminded me of someone i know or i've seen (and continues to do so). i want ot say he's like my sister's boyfriend, but that's not quite right. so basically, i was having a hard time keeping my eyes off of him as Takuya came on, but i did manage to tear my gaze away, and, boy, am i glad i did. Takuya is really, quite amazingly good-looking (but i'd already figured that out from pictures). he looked like a real rocker, with his long brown and bleached hair and black make-up.  he and Kanon were the only one's wearing noticeable eye make-up. it would have been epic to have seen Bou in concert, but i know that's not going to happen. by this time i was already in a daze. i was finally seeing a band (a Japanese band) that i really liked, one (but really two now) of my idols, and they all looked amazing. me and my friends all agreed fully that they looked even better in person, which is not usually what you expect. then, then, then MIKU came on stage. i swear to the Holy Crackers of the books that my jaw dropped. it was like looking at a god or something. he's spectacular. he's got the biggest, brightest eyes you will ever see. honestly, i'd always thought that Miku was a bit funny looking before from pictures, but maybe it was just that weird hairstyle he had at the beginning of their career as An Cafe. i ate those thoughts like a starving wolf eats a deer. i will say this, though, the first hit i got off of him was, 'this guy is cocky. he knows we love him.' it was just the way that he stood there, straight, smirking just barely, looking down upon us like a lord would his minions. then he picked up his mic and welcomed us loudly.
"Hello San Francisco! This is the last gig of the An Cafe tour, do you want to make it special?!"
we shouted our answer enthusiastically. of course we did.
after a bit of excitement-building (as if we needed it) they started off with Cherry Saku Yuuki!!

the music was great. Miku can really sing :D he kept asking us things like, "Do you like San Francisco boy? or do you like Antic Cafe boy?" well, that one's obvious! haha then he asked us if we liked Donald Duck or the Cookie Monster better (as he had puppets of both. i heard that at the Stockholm concert he had Pipi Longstockings and Donald! [he does a Donald Duck voice, so it's kind of his mascot/symbol thing]). we wanted Donald, but instead all the members signed the Cookie Monster and he threw it into the crowd. i hella wanted that. at one point they did introductions. i don't really remember most of them (but i remember Teruki sounding like he had helium in his voice haha) except Kanon's. because it was epic. and full of win. he was all like, "Hello, i am An Cafe's bassist, Kanon! i am Japanese otaku! KAME HAME HAAAAAA!"

i love him.


i was surprised by Yuuki. i didn't really know much about him, and i admit to originally having a bit of a prejudice against him because of his appearance (slaps self. BAD) but i'd gotten over that pretty much and come to appreciate him more, however i still wasn't sure what his personality was like. he seemed kind of like the quite type. he was NOT. i loved it. he jumped around and did all the little dances to Kawayu's Rock and Nyappy in the World 4 and was just in general very pleasant. Teruki was smiling the whole time, just like his sweet-self does. Takuya seemed to put on a bit of a cold front, but he slipped out of it sometimes, mostly when Yuuki or Miku would mess with him. Kanon would've seemed kind of like Takuya, but you could tell by his smiles and general presence that he was having fun. Miku kept us thoroughly entertained, never losing enthusiasm.

then they ended it.

but we weren't going to let it go just like that.

"An Cafe! An Cafe!"

at first i thought they were going to start chanting, 'encore! (ehn-ko-reh)' like they do at NEWS concerts, but i forgot that they're not Japanese XD

it took a while, but eventually the band did come back out, wearing tour shirts. Miku's fly was down :D he made a priceless face when a fan pointed it out.
i forgot to mention this, but they were basically wearing their Aroma outfits, but Miku was the only one completely costumed. his bottom button was undone and his shirt rode up so you could see his belly button and the tiny bit of belly pudge he has :D

anyway, they finished the night with SMILE Ichiban Ii Onna, and Miku spitting water all over us. multiple times. my friend got his water bottle. then he was hitting us with his red mallet and everyone was giving out high-fives to the audience. i was THIS close to getting hit by Miku's mallet and touching Kanon's hand. very disappointing.
another thing i forgot to mention. at one point while Miku was singing, he leaned over and stood on the barrier. the front rows girls were ALL up on him. the were just feeling him up like there was no tomorrow. it was a bit creepy. Michael got to touch his 'sequined thigh' though, probably the only guy that did haha.

after the show Michael went and got merch. he got me cards of the members <3 he took Miku (his idol) but that's ok. i have Kanon and Takuya :D

the night was fantastic. we were all blown away.

the biggest disappointments of the night?
-i didn't get Kanon's autograph or anything signed at all T_T
-we got lost on the way home, and it was FREEZING
-IT ENDED!!!!!!!!!!

why was this probably the best first concert i could've gone to? i've been dreaming of becoming a singer for some time now, but had always thought that being any kind of musician would be fun. after seeing Kanon and Takuya that night, i realized that i would be pretty much completely content just playing guitar or maybe bass. i guess if Alice Nine of the Gazette had come, it would've probably have had a similar effect, but if the band hadn't been at such a small space, it wouldn't have been the same. Alice Nine and the Gazette still need to visit SF though :D and Meever, and NEWS, and KAT-TUN, and Big Bang, and Plastic Tree, and... -rambles on-

it was a phenomenal night and i sincerely hope that they keep their promise and come back soon.

alright, nyappy yo!
(≧∀≦)

oh! i still haven't washed my shirt from that night. it smells too good:D plus it has magical Miku spit on it ;D

alright, over and out!

Title: Elevators and Secrets
Rating: pg-13
Pairing: TegoPi
Summary: Sometimes it's hard to keep a secret from the band, but that doesn't mean you can't try.


The night was cool, but Tegoshi's lips were hot and tempting. Yamapi had waited all night for the moment he'd be able to steal the boy away, walking swiftly to him and grabbing his wrist as soon as the curtains had fallen.
"Yamashita-san...?"
Yamapi knew that Tegoshi was well aware of what he wanted. As soon as they were away from peering eyes and eves-dropping ears, Tegoshi matched the older man's stride and whispered, "Don't you think you're being a little to obvious? You know we have to keep this a secret..."
Yamapi pulled him into an elevator and closed the doors.
"I know that, but do you have any idea how long I've been waiting?" he nosed underneath Tegoshi's ear and planted kisses in a trail down his neck. Tegoshi was surprised by Yamapi's forward-ness, but was enjoying ever bit of it.
He smirked, "I've been waiting just as long, you know."
Yamapi captured his lips fiercely, running his hands underneath the younger man's shirt.
When they broke, Tegoshi chuckled softly, "You really are feisty tonight."
Yamapi nipped the boy's exposed neck and muttered, "It's your fault."
"Just because I couldn't see you last night?"
"It was my birthday." Yamapi raised his head to look seriously into Tegoshi's dark brown orbs. "I was lonely. No one should be lonely on their birthday."
Tegoshi kissed his rosebud lips softly. "I'm sorry."
Yamapi smiled. "It's alright, you're mine now." he grinned and tweaked both of Tegoshi's nipples, making the younger man produce a noise somewhere between a gasp and a moan. Tegoshi was mischievous, his hands snaking their way down to find Yamapi's back pockets. He pulled the older man against him, only Yamapi suppressed his moan.
"Don't hold back." Tegoshi breathed into his ear.
"We're in an elevator." he growled, obviously trying to hold himself back.
Suddenly, there was pounding on the metal doors.
"Does this elevator work? Hey! Is someone in there?!" the angry voice was Ryou's. "Is it broken?"
"I don't know, Nishikido-san." the gentler voice was Koyama's. He tapped the door. "Is this working?"
"Why do you guys keep asking if someone's in there? Why would anyone be in there?" it was Shige.
Massu yawned sleepily. "Maybe we should call for assistance. Or we could take the stairs."
"I'm not taking the damn stairs!" Ryou banged even harder on the doors.
"Nishikido-san, calm down!" Koyama said, trying not to laugh with the others.
Tegoshi and Yamapi were holding each other up, trying not to make any noise as they fell in to hysterics.
 Quickly, the two of them straightened their clothes and arranged their expressions.
"You better be in my room, in my bed, and under me tonight, or I'll have to do something terrible to you." Yamapi whispered from the corner of his mouth.
"As if you would." Tegoshi retorted, grinning suggestively.
The doors opened and both Tegoshi and Yamapi put on thoroughly relieved faces.
"Finally! These doors are working again!" Tegoshi exclaimed, falling against the wall.
"Yeah, I wonder what happened." Yamapi commented, examining the door frame.
"I've been pressing the button for hours!" Ryou complained loudly, stomping into the compartment. The rest followed, still chuckling.
Yamapi glanced at Tegoshi and winked.

------------------------------------------------------

GOMEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i'm late for Pi's birthday ;_; HAPPY BIRTHDAY PI!!! <3
not my favorite pairing, but kind of fun, actually. :)

also! for those of you who actually read my stuff regularly (and those of you who are interested) i may start writing fics out of the Johnny's fandom, so be aware!

Title: care
Rating: pg
Pairing: Akame
Summary: AU Kame and Jin are college students that met recently, but there is some obvious chemistry between them.

"This doesn't look too hard..." Akanishi muttered to himself, scanning over the page in his recipe book. He got up and checked the fridge once again, just double checking that he had all that he'd need. He looked at his phone; 1:30, he'd be here soon.

Bin-bon! Bin-bon!

Jin nearly jumped out of his skin at the sound of the doorbell. Since when had he gotten so tense?

Akanishi calmly opened the door and smirk at the man standing there. "I had a feeling that you'd be here early, Kamenashi-san."

Kamenashi Kazuya chuckled, "I guess you know me better than I thought."

Jin let the other man in and went to the kitchen, quickly being followed by Kamenashi.

"What are we doing, Akanishi-san?"

"You can call me Jin, remember?"

Kamenashi blushed slightly and nodded. He'd only met Akanishi Jin a few weeks earlier when the semester had started, but the older man had imediatly taken an interest in him. Kamenashi liked Akanishi too, he was stylish and friendly with a cool air about him, but not apathetic. In fact, Kamenashi often felt like he might like Akanishi more than he'd initially thought.

"We're gonna make cupcakes today."

Kamenashi snapped out of his thoughts and looked up. "Why?"
Akanishi grinned and bumped his elbow playfully. "It's your birthday, dork."

Kamenashi smiled but looked surprised. "How'd you know it was my birthday?"

"Let's just say... a little bird told me." Jin smiled and turned to reach up into the cupboard for flour.
Kazuya shook his head, grinning shyly.

Kamenashi watched Akanishi as he mixed ingredients and fetched utensils, noticed the way he moved, the sway of his hips, the slight flick of his wrist, the gentle toss of his head. Kamenashi had heard knew that Akanishi was a singer (although he'd never heard him sing) but perhaps he was a dancer as well? He had the grace and fluidity of one.

"Could you get me the paper cupcake holders?" Akanishi asked, pointing vaguely at a shelf and adding, "Sorry for making you work."

"First you tell me that we're going to make cupcakes, and then you tell me to sit down and relax! I really don't mind getting things for you." Kamenashi laughed, standing and stretching his arm up to get the box. Somehow, something felt uncomfortable. He grabbed the paper cups and turned around, only to catch in a glimpse Akanishi's eyes quickly looking away; so he's been watching him. Kamenashi felt heat rise in his cheeks and an indescribable tightening in his chest. He handed Akanishi the box.

"Thanks." Akanishi said quietly.

The silence stretched on like a void.

Finally, Kamenashi cleared his throat and went to sit down again. Akanishi swiftly placed the paper cups in the sheet and scooped out the batter. Once the cupcakes were in the oven, Akanishi came and fell into a chair near Kamenashi, smiling a bit nervously.

"So..." Kamenashi began, a guitar catching his eye from the corner of the front room. "I hear you're a musician." he gave a small smile, subtly suggesting that Akanishi play something for him. Akanishi's expression brightened visibly.
"Yeah! I do. You wanna hear something?"
Kamenashi nodded and followed him into the other room. The younger man sat on a pillow while the other grabbed his guitar and sat cross-legged across from him, briefly tuning it.
He strummed a cord and then picked a few strings.
With a slow rock tempo, he began to sing.

"Within affairs and lies, I am burdened by my awkwardness at love

Title: Slice of Love
Rating: pg
Pairing: tegomasu
Summary: Masuda tries again


Masuda hung his head and let the tears flow silently down his face. He'd always been shy, and now that he'd reached out for someone he really cared for, he was shot down. Like a flower seeking sun, only to be stomped on by a clumsy foot when it'd just found the light. He leaned against the wall of the Jimusho and slide down to the pavement, resting his head on his knees.

He wasn't sure how long he'd been there, but finally he heard Koyama's voice softly calling his name.
"Massu?" the tall man said quietly, crouching beside him and putting a gentle arm across his hunched back. "What happened?"
Masuda couldn't speak. The tears choked his voice and caught his words in a net of anguish.

Finally, the tears ran dry and he looked up, staring blearily at the alley by the Jimusho that he sat in. He looked down at his hands and whispered a hoarse question, "Why is life like this?"
"Like what, Massu?" Koyama probed gently.
Masuda gave a shaky sigh. "Why does it have to be so hard?"
Koyama watched Masuda's profile. "What happened, Masuda-kun?" seriousness in his soft voice.
Masuda finally looked at the older man.
"I got rejected."
Koyama was silent, but eventually gave the younger man a small, sympathetic smile. "It happens to all of us, but it's never easy. Who rejected you, Massu? Did you know her from the pool?"
Masuda looked back down at the ground and pushed some pebbles around with a stick. He mumbled something.
"What?" Koyama asked, not having heard what he'd said.
Masuda paused before quietly repeating, "Not 'her'."
Koyama eyes stared at Masuda in surprise. "It was a man?"
Masuda nodded slowly.
Koyama couldn't help but grin and jostle Masuda playfully. "Massu! I didn't know... Well, it's good to know I'm not alone."
Masuda's head snapped up and he gaped at Koyama. "You're gay?!" he practically exclaimed.
Koyama nodded sheepishly. "Yeah. I was bi for a while, but after a while I realized..."
Masuda smiled slightly and went back to the rocks on the ground. "Well I'm not gay. I think I'm... bisexual...?" there was a slight question to his voice, as if he didn't really want to own up to that title.
Koyama nodded calmly.  Carefully, he asked, "So, I guess it was Tegoshi?"
Masuda looked up at him, puzzled and a bit alarmed. "How'd you know?"
"You asked to talk to him. When you said you'd been rejected, I assumed you'd asked him to help you ask the girl out, but it hadn't worked. I did think it was a little weird that he came back in without you. Although, this would explain..."
Masuda searched Koyama's face, looking for the rest of that sentence. "Explain what?"
Koyama sighed and looked Masuda in the eyes. "Massu, he looked really shocked, and confused. But he almost looked mad..."
Masuda swore loudly and stood up abruptly. "I knew I shouldn't have done it! He'll report me for sure."
"I'm not so sure." Koyama said reasonable, standing up as well. "Call him tonight and talk to him. I don't think he's actually mad at you. We have to get back to rehersal, though."
Masuda hesitated, then sighed and nodded, following Koyama back into the building.

*

Tegoshi didn't look or speak to Masuda the rest of the day. He seemed completely focused on his work, but kept messing up. Masuda wasn't doing much better. He was so distracted and distressed by thoughts of what Tegoshi must be thinking that he couldn't concentrate on what he was doing. As if the day wasn't stressful enough already, Tegoshi didn't even say 'good bye' to Masuda as he left.

*


"Tegoshi, I know what I said earlier today was weird, but it's the truth. Please don't hate me. I can't help the way I feel. We can just be friends. Aaaah... But that's so lame!" Masuda turned from the mirror on his heel, running a hand over his face. He looked over at the phone that sat silently on his bed. Masuda walked over and picked up the phone, only to throw it into the pillows and fall onto the softness of the comforter. "Why does this all have to be so difficult?" he moaned. Suddenly, the phone buzzed once right next to Masuda's face. He nearly jumped off the bed before picking up the phone and lipping it open. He got a text message... from Tegoshi.

Masuda stared at the phone, unbelieving.

Finally, he snapped out of his trance and opened the message.

Come over. I want to talk.

Masuda still couldn't believe this was happening, but his thumbs worked quickly as he texted the other man back.

Sure.

*


Masuda stood in front of Tegoshi's door, almost trembling with nervousness. After what seemed like hours, he knocked meekly. There was the sound of footsteps and then the door was opened. Tegoshi stood in the frame. He was wearing a plain grey v-neck sweater and slim-fitting, dark jeans, but Masuda had to swallow a lump in his throat at the sight of him.

"Come in." Tegoshi said quietly, stepping aside.

Masuda removed his shoes and went inside. There were posters of Tegoshi and NEWS littering the walls, but no one else seemed to be home. He stepped into the living room and waited awkwardly for Tegoshi, as he'd never been here before.

"Please, sit." Tegoshi offered, sensing Masuda's question. They both took seats across from each other at the kotatsu. Masuda let his eyes roam around the room, fidgety and unsure. Tegoshi, on the other hand, watched the other with a calm seriousness in his eyes.

"Massu."

Masuda nearly jumped at his name being called so sternly, although it was said barely above a whisper.

"Y-yes?"

"About today-"
"Look!" Masuda interrupted, leaning forward a bit. "I know it was weird, but... But I-I just wanted you to know!"
Tegoshi almost smiled at Masuda's jumbled state. "Massu, I know that what you said was true-"
"And I know that you don't like guys, so I know that it was awkward for you, and may still be. I shouldn't have brought it up. If you want to stop Tegomasu activities and stuff, that's... that's fine..."

Tegoshi frowned, completely disregarding the rest of what Masuda had said and focusing on one comment in particular.

"How do you know that I don't like guys?"

Masuda stilled, staring at the younger man, unsure of the tone of his voice.

Tegoshi leaned back on one hand and gazed at Masuda levely. "You can't say something like that without any proof."

"B-but!" Masuda stumbled over his words. "I've seen you drool over girls!"

"I never said I didn't like girls."

"B-but..." Masuda was at his wits' end.

Tegoshi gave a small smile and leaned on both elbows on the surface of the table. "I'm bisexual. Just like I assume you've figured out about yourself, right?"

Masuda nodded slowly. "B-but earlier... Well, I guess you just don't like me that way..."

"Earlier today..." Tegoshi began deliberately, picking his words thoughtfully. "I was surprised, no doubt. And... confused. A bit... hurt, in a way."

"Hurt? Why?" Masuda looked worried.

Tegoshi studied his laced fingers. "Just two days before, I'd seen you talking amiably with a girl. I guess you could say I felt like you were just playing with me. That you wanted me for some reason to get that girl. Which is why I was mad earlier."

"I'd never do that to you! She's just a friend! I can prove it too!" Masuda said, leaning forward, his expression desperate.

Tegoshi laughed slightly. "I was also confused, you know. I never thought that you were bi. I'd seen you go after girls so often."
Masuda looked as if he were about to say something to prove himself, but Tegoshi spoke before him. "I believe you now, though."
He looked Masuda in the eyes and smiled, that same warm smile he'd given him just that morning. Masuda couldn't help but grin back, that faded quickly, though.

"You really... upset me... earlier."

Tegoshi opened his mouth, but no words came out.

Finally, two soft words could be heard ao clearly they seemed to echo through the empty house.

"I'm sorry."

Masuda looked up at Tegoshi and saw the most sincere remorse he'd ever seen in the younger man's eyes.

Slowly, tentatively, Masuda reached out and took one of Tegoshi's larger hands in his own.

"Thank you."

Tegoshi squeezed Masuda's hand and smiled. "Looks like we ended up spending Valentine's Day night together anyway, huh?"
Masuda laughed softly. "I guess so."
He began to retract his hand, but Tegoshi held it.
"You said you like me, right?" Tegoshi asked quietly, looking at their hands.
Masuda nodded firmly. "Yes. I do."
A shy smile slipped onto Tegoshi's face. "I still can't believe this. It's so unreal."
"Why?"
"I've been hoping for this day for a long time." Tegoshi looked up at Masuda, grinning, eyes twinkling.
Masuda's eyes widened. "Really? Are you serious?!" he said, excited.
Tegoshi laughed and nodded.

Gently, Tegoshi leaned forward and sweetly stole Masuda's first kiss, long past due.

----------------------------

haha i made it fluffy 8'D i couldn't help it! it's TEGOMASU. tegomasu is supposed to be fluffy! plus it's my otp and i can't stand to see them unhappy :x